The plot thickens . . .

One of the dogs was playing with yet another McDonald's tray tonight, so that explains the hole in the tray (both trays, actually), but where the heck are the trays coming from???  Here are the options I have come up with:

• My brother, Mark, is infamous for finding and bringing home random things like a tetherball pole with a cement stand but no ball, and a broken down sled-type thing that he tried to hook the dogs to and make them pull it.  He's been in China since February, though.  
• Someone knows I'm dieting* and is taunting me with thoughts of french fries.
• The Hamburglar is real and really is stalking me.

The night before the first tray appeared on the deck, there was a strange and mysterious noise outside that set the dogs to barking.  I was too lazy to get out of bed and check, plus I figured if it was someone trying to break in to kill me, that would just mean that I wouldn't have to worry about planning the wedding.  So that's where things stand.  We'll see if any other trays appear. 

Also, a quick update on the herpes in my eye:  it's still here, plus my lymph nodes are so swollen that you can see them sticking out of my neck.  The cold sore is getting a tiny bit better-I started putting some doTerra oils on it just in case stuff like that works.  My throat is still killing me, plus I have a rash on my belly and a strange and itchy bug bite on my cheek.  Basically my body is mutinying.

*I'm down to what I weighed when I was in high school, which is totally awesome, but I was fat in high school, so it's not quite as awesome as it could be.  Still working on it, though!

a mystery

When I let the dogs out this morning I discovered this sitting by the back door:

Keep in mind that the back door opens up onto a deck, so it's not like it could have just blown into the fenced in backyard and landed by the door.  And why would someone steal a tray from McDonald's?  And why the hole?  I think I'm being stalked by the Hamburglar. 

In other, unrelated news, I have pink eye.  I also have a gigantic, nasty cold sore, which is probably where the pink eye came from.  So basically, I have eye herpes.  At least it's getting me out of work for a couple of days.

I'm feeling less stressed about the wedding planning and the house.  I've decided that I'm going to eliminate a lot of stuff from the reception for the time being.  If, after I quit my job, I have time to do these things, great.  If not, oh well.  The world will keep turning whether or not I have a wedding cake.

sick . . . sick . . .

In addition to having a great time at the conference (see the last post) and learning a lot, I also picked up a nasty, little bug. I spent the entire weekend doing one of the following:

• sleeping
• trying desperately to breathe
• trying desperately to swallow*
• blowing my nose
• shopping in Jackson (hey, I gotta go when I have time off!)

*Keep it clean, Edvalsons!

careful!

I once had a roommate who accused me of being a hypochondriac. This was ironic because for everything I thought was wrong with me, she had already had it and most of the time, had it worse. But I digress . . . here's an article about 6 Things Your Body Does Every Day (That Can Destroy You). So, since you could die at any second, let us eat, drink and be merry. Or are we not supposed to do that? I can never remember if the Bible tells us to do something or not to do something, hence that whole coveting my neighbor's ass debacle.

Georgia Day 3

Saturday was the big day-Erin was finally getting married!!! Other than a last minute run to the Rite Aid to try to find some products to deal with the humidity (It wasn't an afro, and I'm not Jewish, so it wasn't a Jewfro, so maybe I'll call my situation a MoFro.), we didn't do much except get ready for the wedding. Everyone looked great-the bride was gorgeous, the bridesmaids looked fabulous in their dresses, and the mother of the bride looked beautiful. The guys looked good too, but you can't really say much about a tux. I did manage to light the memory candle without tripping along the way or knocking the candle over and burning down the church. I was quite proud of myself. The ceremony went off without a hitch, and after pictures, we headed out to the reception site. This is when things started to go terribly wrong. So remember how I'm vegan? And remember how I said I was taking a break this weekend, and just eating what was available? Yeah, well that ended up not going so well. On the way out to the reception, my stomach started to feel not so great. I downed a couple of stomach pills, hoping that would help, but unfortunately, it didn't. Shortly before we started eating (the reception food was delicious, btw), the pain started to really hit. I took another pill, praying that they would start to kick in, but after a little while, I realized that was just not happening. I wanted to stay to see Erin and Jon off, but I only lasted through the toasts, cake cutting, and first dance, and then I had to hurry and say good-byes (It's possible I got teary eyed each time I hugged someone good-bye.) and get out of there. I was seriously dying the whole drive back to the hotel. I've cheated and eaten non-vegan a couple of times before and had a pretty bad upset stomach, but this far and away put those moments to shame. I'll spare you the details, but I will say that there was internal intestinal bleeding involved, and that is why I will never eat meat again. Never ever ever. Never.

surgery update

So I finally had the surgery last Wednesday morning, right in time for Thanksgiving. What fun! It went well, and they did find endometriosis and burned away the lesions. I even have pictures, although I don't know what any of it is. There is an organ in one of the pictures that I'm pretty sure comes with the turkey giblets, but that was all I recognized. I actually felt pretty good after it and I even cooked most of the Thanksgiving dinner the next day. I started feeling crappy on Sunday though, and on Monday had some blood work done to make sure there wasn't an infection, and also had a CT scan to make sure I didn't have any blood clots. Fortunately, everything looked o.k. and I feel much better today. I do feel slightly sick at the thought of the bill for yet another CT scan, but better safe than sorry, I guess.

I think what I have learned from this whole experience is that I need to take better care of myself. Not that anything could prevent cysts and endometriosis, but all the same, I would rather prevent anything from happening than deal with it if it does happen. So . . . I started doing yoga again today! I really like it and there are even full length (like 40+ minutes) on YouTube. If I stick with it (keep in mind that I have stick-with-it-issues), there are several studios around and I may consider getting a membership. But again, the odds of me sticking with anything are slim to none, so take this all with a grain of salt. Sometimes I wonder if I have ADD (definitely not the H part, though!) because seriously, very few things hold my attention for very long. I can't even read one book at a time, I have to have three or four going. But anyway, that's not the point of this post, so I'll be done now.

slightly nervous

The surgery is tomorrow! We had scheduled it for Friday, but then they called back and said the surgical center isn't open Friday, so tomorrow afternoon it is! If something should happen to me, (i.e. I die) make sure my make-up goes to a good home.

surgery

So I am going to be having surgery. I'm going to be on progesterone for 10-14 days to induce my period, and then a couple days into that, I'll have the surgery. Obviously I'm not thrilled about having surgery, but at the same time, I'm excited to hopefully have this taken care of. Only problem is it's going to be right around Thanksgiving (depending on how many days of the hormones I decide to take). I'm aiming for the day after Thanksgiving, but we'll just have to see how it all plays out.

November 11, 2009 (and updates)

Outside my window . . . it's dark. And still too warm for this time of year. Supposedly a cold front is arriving tomorrow. We shall see. We shall see.

I am thinking . . . I'm feeling much better. I've had the flu (not swine, just regular) for the last few days. I actually managed to drag myself out of bed and shower today for the first time since Sunday. Gross, I know, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do. I think when I'm sick I develop a sudden allergy to water. I'm pretty sure it makes me even more sick to be clean and to be in clean clothes. I'm sure this can somehow be scientifically proven.

I am thankful for . . . sick dreams. Not sick in a bad way. When I'm sickly, my dreams are more vivid and interesting.

From the kitchen . . . I ate rice and scrambled eggs today! Whoohoo! And they stayed down-double whoohoo!

I am wearing . . . pajamas, but here's the kicker-they're clean pajamas!

I am going . . . to go to bed shortly.

I am reading . . . I'm rereading "Eat, Pray, Love." The Italy section has been making me think of all sorts of delicious things I want to make.

I am hoping . . . that because I've already had the flu, I won't get it again this year, meaning I will have immunity from the swine flu.

I am hearing . . . Theme from "The Mission" by Ennio Morricone. I don't listen to much classical-ish music but I absolutely love this song. From about 50 seconds in, until 1:50ish, it sounds like heaven. I believe this song is on my current playlist on the side bar if you want to check it out. Ooh! The song just switched to Yanni's "Aria" which I also think sounds like heaven.

Around the house . . . I have a sudden, overwhelming urge to change my sheets. I'm just thinking of all the sick germs on them, as well as the greasy hair nastiness on my pillow case from the last few days.

One of my favorite things . . . Glee!!! Did anyone watch tonight? I love Sue Sylvester and the scene with her sister made me get a little misty. Oh, and Quinn needs to stop being such a biotch to Finn, especially since he's not the baby daddy.

A picture . . . Me and the neti pot. I blogged about this. You can read about it here.



UPDATES:

• Unfortunately, I was forced to clean out the garage like I feared in my last blog post.
  
• I see the ob/gyn surgeon dude tomorrow. Hopefully all will go well and I will have something to report.
• Not an update, but an aside: Did anyone see Carrie Prejean on The View this week? If not, could someone (Traci) please go watch the clip on YouTube so that we can discuss her hostility and stupidity. Thanks!
  

best doctor's appointment ever!

Once again, if you don't want to know about my gimpy lady bits, please stop reading now.

I had my appointment with the ob/gyn today and it was freakin' awesome! Up until today I was really frustrated and I felt like nobody was listening to me, so before the appointment I got myself all psyched up to speak up for myself and be my own advocate, and I was all ready to go and I wasn't going to take any crap, etc. It turns out the doctor was a sweet old man (I'm guessing 70's) and get this, he listened to every single thing I had to say. Upon the advice of several people, I had typed up a list of all of my "female issues" over the years. It was seriously a page long, and instead of taking it from me and glancing at it, he had me go over every single thing on my list. Every. Single. Thing. It was awesome. And I told him about this summer when I went to the doctor because of sudden, excruciating back pain and how the doctor just dismissed me and said it was because I'm fat and I needed to see a dietician, and this doctor, who is possibly my new hero, actually rolled his eyes and looked disgusted!!! And then . . . THEN . . . he said he was sorry that this hadn't been diagnosed ten years ago! So let's recap . . . he listened to my entire list AND apologized! How cool is that!

Before I get carried away with my enthusiasm, he said he's 98% sure that I have endometriosis, which happens to be his specialty. I'm going to see a doctor next week who, if he agrees with the diagnosis, will go in laparoscopically and remove the endometrial tissue. Do you know how great it is to have someone finally (after 15 years) figure out what the problem is (well, hopefully, at least) and know what to do about it!?! It's just nice to finally be able to say that all of this crap over the years is because of one specific thing and that it can be managed. Hooray!

Oh, and this was funny-I was standing at the nurse's desk, waiting for my referral, and another one of the doctor's patients called up and from what I could tell, it sounded like she was trying to get pregnant and was ovulating. That's not what's funny. He got on the phone with her and told her to have her husband (who's the student and would be on campus) come by the health center and get a specimen cup and then have him um . . . give a specimen. That's not what's funny either. What's funny is that he told her, and this is almost word for word, not to just send him to the bathroom with the cup, but to make a little love and help him get the specimen. I thought that was awesome.

gimpy ovaries update

I went to the doctor this morning and he doesn't know what the problemo is, so I have to go have a CT scan tomorrow morning. The latest development, and this may be completely unrelated, is that I have had the worst headache ever since yesterday afternoon. I woke up every 2-3 hours all night long because of the pain. It sucked. And I feel like complete crap. And the frustration of everything led to me crying at the doctor's office, which just made me feel even more stupid. Oh, and this is far and away beyond the scope of TMI, but I'm telling you anyway-the doctor today wanted to do that thing where they stick their fingers up your vajayjay and feel around. Right away that equals awkwardness, but I also happened to be on my period and had a tampon in at the time. I had to take it out and put it in the hazardous waste box. And then, because everything about the situation wasn't awkward enough, he said he couldn't feel my uterus. I'm pretty sure it hadn't fallen out, so I don't know what the problem was. I've never had anyone not be able to feel my uterus before. But then again I also haven't had a whole lot of people try.

I'll let you know tomorrow how the CT scan goes.

my lady bits

*****If you're a guy and/or don't want to know about my pelvic issues, stop reading now.

Before yesterday, I hadn't had a period since July and since I knew there was no way I could be pregnant, I was a little bit concerned. Not overly concerned though, since I've never been regular and have been on and off birth control since junior high to try to regulate things. Anyway, so I started it yesterday and was as excited as one could be about such a thing, but then early this morning I started to feel pain down there. I assumed it was cramps, but it got worse and was steady instead of intermittent. I've had several ovarian cysts burst before, so I assumed that's what it was and went to the Urgent Care to have it checked out. They did an ultrasound and found a 5 cm. cyst on the left side and fluid on the right side where a cyst may have already burst. Apparently 5 cm. is the borderline between having surgery and waiting to see what happens. Now I have to go in on Wednesday and see a different doctor and figure out what we're going to do. I'm getting really tired of all these female issues! I'll keep you updated . . .

Staph Update

I am pleased to announced that after only a couple of days of being on massive amounts of antibiotics, my festering, leaking wounds (now isn't that a great visual!) are much better. I was supposed to go back to the health center today to get them checked and get the test results from the swab they took, but um . . . the wireless wasn't working on my laptop all day, so I had to rush home to check my email and Reader. Admit it, you would have done the same thing. I'll just go tomorrow. But anyway, this picture sucks 'cause I took it with my phone. They look much better-no more festering, and no more swelling. Just a little redness and scabs. That, I can handle.

truly disgusting

I got a little nauseous looking at these up close. But hey, at least they weren't oozing puss when these pictures were taken!

The first one is of the not so bad lesion. The next two are of the big, nasty one. You can't see it very well, but the second one has kind of star shaped dark red/purple-y streaks spreading out of it.

nastiness

So a week ago I discovered a couple of bug bites on my legs and didn't think much about it until they started getting all red and swollen and full of puss. Sick. I thought they had just gotten infected somehow, so I slapped some Neosporin on them and went on my merry way while occasionally wondering if maybe the bug had laid babies under my skin and they were growing. Well finally this morning I called the nurse at the health center and she told me to come in and have them checked out, which I did, wondering the whole way down there if they would slice my wounds open and spider babies would come pouring out. Fortunately, that was not the case, but unfortunately it turns out that my bug bites have turned into lesions. Nasty, infected lesions caused by MRSA, which is a kind of staph infection. Apparently this infection, which is really contagious, has been spreading on campus. Oh yeah, and it's some kind of superbug that doesn't respond to normal antibiotics. Good thing BYU is warning students about this, huh! Oh that's right, they aren't. But anyway, they gave me a shot of antibiotics, a bunch of antibiotic pills and antibiotic cream. Hopefully this will work. I have to check back with them on Monday. So yeah, that's the story of my nasty, puss-filled, weeping lesions. Oh, and in case you were wondering, I absolutely did take pictures just so I could post them on my blog. They'll be up later today. I know you can't wait.