Monday, June 30, 2008

Please do not

1. Sign the Honor Code and agree to dress a certain way, and then wear short shorts to class. If there is a legitimate reason for you to wear said shorts (which there isn't), please do not sit with your knees all the way up so you can rest your head on them. Wanna know why? Because I don't appreciate getting glimpses of your junk, and I don't think Heavenly Father does either.

2. Spend the entire two hour class period sharing a beverage with your spouse and mouthing "I love you" to each other. This is not cute, it is vomit-inducing.

3. Raise your hand and share with the entire class how your wife turned out to be a lesbian and cheated on you with her best friend. What am I supposed to do with that information? I can't look you in the eye anymore.

4 comments:

Traci said...

That is hilarious! Seeing another person's junk is digusting, but it is one of those things that you just cannot help but look. And then look again. Is that just me? People like that couple mouthing I love you....I agree - vomit-inducing. And the guy with the lesbian wife - perhaps he has a blog about it...I'd be interested in that.

Wendy said...

you crack me up.

Becky said...

Ok I had one of the worst days and you just made me laugh out loud!!!! I don't think that married people realise how annoying they can be...especially those living in utah county but more importantly those who are going to BYU together (like they are actually going to graduate anyway...they will get shackled with a kid within a year and then not be able to finish because its too expensive and they don't have enough time to do it). The kicker for me is when they ask why you are not married and then give you a disapproving look because they just can't figure out why you are not(like having an idiot who got married after knowing their spouse for a grand total of three days is going to make me feel bad about myself...settling is not an option). Ok now that I have that pent up frustration off my chest I feel much better.....

Erin said...

So...Kim...did you have a bad day?